Saturday, April 30, 2011

Moral

* Kutta, Sher Aur Bandar
*
Ek din ek kutta jungle main raasta kho gaya. Tabhi usne dekha ek sher uskii
taraf aa raha hai. Kutte ki saans rookh gayi. "Aaj to kaam tamaam mera!"
usne socha. Phir usne saamane kuchh sookhi haddiyan padi dekhi. Woh aate hue
sher ki taraf peeth kar ke baith gaya aur ek sookhi hadii ko choosne laga
aur zor zor se bolne laga, "wah! Sher ko khaane ka mazaa hi kuch aur hai. Ek
aur mil jaaye to poori daawat ho jayegi!"
Aur usne zor se dakaar mara. Is bar sher soch mein pad gayaa. Usne socha "ye
kutta to sher ka shikar karta hai! Jaan bacha kara bhago!"
Aur sher wahan se jaan bachaa ke bhaaga.
Ped par baitha ek Bandar yeh sab tamasha dekh raha tha. Usne socha yeh mauka
achha hai sher ko saari kahani bata deta hoon - sher se dosti ho jayegi aur
usse zindagi bhar ke liye jaan ka khatra dur ho jayega.. Woh phataphat sher
ke pichhe bhaaga. Kutte ne Bandar ko jaate hue dekh liya aur samajh gayaki
koi locha hai. Udhar Bandar ne sher ko sab bata diya ki kaise kutte ne use
bewakoof banaya hai. Sher zor se dahada, "chal mere saath abhi uski leela
khatam karta hoon" aur Bandar ko apani peeth par baitha kar sher kutte ki
taraf
lapka.
Can u imagine the quick HR  Management by the DOG...
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Kutte ne sher ko aate dekha to ek baar phir uskii taraf peeth karke baith
gaya aur zor zor se bolne laga, "Is Bandar ko bhej ke 1 ghanta ho gaya,
saala ek sher phasaa kar nahi la sakta!"
Moral of the story: There are many such monkeys around us, try to identify
them and beware of them.

Friday, April 29, 2011

Brilliant Read

Some, rather most organizations reject his CV today because he has
changed jobs frequently (10 in 14 years). My friend, the ˜job hopper™
(referred here as Mr. JH), does not mind it. well he does not need to
mind it at all. Having worked full-time with 10 employer companies in
just 14 years gives Mr. JH the relaxing edge that most of the ˜company
loyal™ employees are struggling for today. Today, Mr. JH too is laid
off like some other 14-15 year experienced guys “ the difference being
the latter have just worked in 2-3 organizations in the same number of
years. Here are the excerpts of an interview with Mr. JH:

Q: Why have you changed 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: To get financially sound and stable before getting laid off the second time.
Q: So you knew you would be laid off in the year 2009?
A: Well I was laid off first in the year 2002 due to the first global
economic slowdown. I had not got a full-time job before January 2003
when the economy started looking up; so I had struggled for almost a
year without job and with compromises.
Q: Which number of job was that?
A: That was my third job.
Q: So from Jan 2003 to Jan 2009, in 6 years, you have changed 8 jobs
to make the count as 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: I had no other option. In my first 8 years of professional life, I
had worked only for 2 organizations thinking that jobs are deserved
after lot of hard work and one should stay with an employer company to
justify the saying ˜employer loyalty™. But I was an idiot.
Q: Why do you say so?
A: My salary in the first 8 years went up only marginally. I could not
save enough and also, I had thought that I had a ˜permanent™ job, so I
need not worry about ˜what will I do if I lose my job™. I could never
imagine losing a job because of economic slowdown and not because of
my performance. That was January 2002.
Q: Can you brief on what happened between January 2003 and 2009.
A: Well, I had learnt my lessons of being ˜company loyal™ and not
˜money earning and saving loyal™. But then you can save enough only
when you earn enough. So I shifted my loyalty towards money making and
saving “ I changed 8 jobs in 6 years assuring all my interviewers
about my stability.
Q: So you lied to your interviewers; you had already planned to change
the job for which you were being interviewed on a particular day?
A: Yes, you can change jobs only when the market is up and companies
are hiring. You tell me “ can I get a job now because of the slowdown?
No. So one should change jobs for higher salaries only when the market
is up because that is the only time when companies hire and can afford
the expected salaries.
Q: What have you gained by doing such things?
A: That's the question I was waiting for. In Jan 2003, I had a fixed
salary (without variables) of say Rs. X p.a. In January 2009, my
salary was 8X. So assuming my salary was Rs.3 lakh p.a. in Jan 2003,
my last drawn salary in Jan 2009 was Rs.24 lakh p.a. (without
variable). I never bothered about variable as I had no intention to
stay for 1 year and go through the appraisal process to wait for the
company to give me a hike.
Q: So you decided on your own hike?
A: Yes, in 2003, I could see the slowdown coming again in future like
it had happened in 2001-02. Though I was not sure by when the next
slowdown would come, I was pretty sure I wanted a ˜debt-free™ life
before being laid off again. So I planned my hike targets on a yearly
basis without waiting for the year to complete.
Q: So are you debt-free now?
A: Yes, I earned so much by virtue of job changes for money and spent
so little that today I have a loan free 2 BR flat (1200 sq.. feet)
plus a loan free big car without bothering about any EMIs. I am laid
off too but I do not complain at all. If I have laid off companies for
money, it is OK if a company lays me off because of lack of money.
Q: Who is complaining?
A: All those guys who are not getting a job to pay their EMIs off are
complaining. They had made fun of me saying I am a job hopper and do
not have any company loyalty. Now I ask them what they gained by their
company loyalty; they too are laid off like me and pass comments to me
“ why will you bother about us, you are already debt-free. They were
still in the bracket of 12-14 lakh p.a. when they were laid off.
Q: What is your advice to professionals?
A: Like Narayan Murthy had said “ love your job and not your company
because you never know when your company will stop loving you. In the
same lines, love yourself and your family needs more than the
company's needs. Companies can keep coming and going; family will
always remain the same. Make money for yourself first and
simultaneously make money for the company, not the other way around.
Q: What is your biggest pain point with companies?
A: When a company does well, its CEO will address the entire company
saying, ˜well done guys, it is YOUR company, keep up the hard work, I
am with you. But when the slowdown happens and the company does not do
so well, the same CEO will say, œIt is MY company and to save the
company, I have to take tough decisions including asking people to go.
So think about your financial stability first; when you get laid off,
your kids will complain to you and not your boss.

Must Read

If   you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have   been
as sharp as this policeman. He was being  cross-examined  by a defense
attorney during a felony  trial. The lawyer was  trying to undermine
the police  officer's credibility...

Q:  'Officer  -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?'
A:   'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching  the
description of the offender, running several blocks   away.'
Q:   'Officer -- who provided this description?'
A:   'The officer who responded to the  scene.'
Q:   'A fellow officer provided the description of this  so-called
offender. Do you trustyour fellow officers?'
A:   'Yes, sir. With my life.'
Q:   'With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do  you  have
a room where you change your clothes in  preparation for  your daily
duties?'
A:   'Yes sir, we do!'
Q:   'And do you have a locker in the room?'
A:   'Yes sir, I do.'

Q: 'And do you  have a lock on your   locker?'
A:   'Yes sir.'
Q:   'Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow  officers  with
your life, you find it necessary to lock  your locker in  a room you
share with these same  officers?'
A:   'You see, sir -- we share the building with the court   complex,
and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk   through that room.'

The   courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a  prompt recess  was
called. The officer on the stand has  been nominated for  this year's
'Best Comeback' line --  and we think he'll   win.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Rajni Mobile

NOKIA planning to launch 
Rajnikanth 'R' series in 2012
Features:
*20sims
*10yr battery backup
*1 ZB memory
*1000 Megapixles Cam
*TV
*Oven
*Washing Machine
*Fridge
*AC
*Mini Rocket Launcher
*Mini AK-47
and the new special feature 24G which is better than 3G
In this u can pul-out  the person from phon & talk directly!!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Anna Hazaare

1. Who is Anna Hazare? An ex-army man. Fought 1965 Indo-Pak War
2. What's so special about him? He built a village Ralegaon Siddhi in
Ahamad Nagar district, Maharashtra
3. So what? This village is a self-sustained model village. Energy is
produced in the village itself from solar power, biofuel and wind
mills. In 1975, it used to be a poverty clad village. Now it is one of
the richest village in India. It has become a model for
self-sustained, eco-friendly & harmonic village.
4. Ok,...? This guy, Anna Hazare was awarded Padma Bhushan and is a
known figure for his social activities.
5. Really, what is he fighting for? He is supporting a cause, the
amendment of a law to curb corruption in India.
6. How that can be possible? He is advocating for a Bil, The Jan
Lokpal Bill (The Citizen Ombudsman Bill), that will form an autonomous
authority who will make politicians (ministers), beurocrats (IAS/IPS)
accountable for their deeds.
8. It's an entirely new thing right..? In 1972, the bill was proposed
by then Law minister Mr. Shanti Bhushan. Since then it has been
neglected by the politicians and some are trying to change the bill to
suit thier theft (corruption).
7. Oh.. He is going on a hunger strike for that whole thing of passing
a Bill ! How can that be possible in such a short span of time? The
first thing he is asking for is: the government should come forward
and announce that the bill is going to be passed. Next, they make a
joint committee to DRAFT the JAN LOKPAL BILL. 50% goverment
participation and 50% public participation. Because you cant trust the
government entirely for making such a bill which does not suit them.
8. Fine, What will happen when this bill is passed? A LokPal will be
appointed at the centre. He will have an autonomous charge, say like
the Election Commission of India. In each and every state, Lokayukta
will be appointed. The job is to bring all alleged party to trial in
case of corruptions within 1 year. Within 2 years, the guilty will be
punished. Not like, Bofors scam or Bhopal Gas Tragedy case, that has
been going for last 25 years without any result.
9. Is he alone? Whoelse is there in the fight with Anna Hazare? Baba
Ramdev, Ex. IPS Kiran Bedi, Social Activist Swami Agnivesh, RTI
activist Arvind Kejriwal and many more. Prominent personalities like
Aamir Khan is supporting his cause.
10. Ok, got it. What can I do? At least we can spread the message.
How? Putting status message, links, video, changing profile pics.   At
least we can support Anna Hazare and the cause for uprooting
corruption from India.  At least we can hope that his Hunger Strike
does not go in vain. At least we can pray for his good health.
Thanks for reading.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Facts

Jersey no.10
Age 37=3+7=10
ht 5'5"=5+5=10
WC winning date
2/4/2011=2+4+2+0+1+1=10
WC after 28 yrs=2+8=10
Strike rate in WC=91=9+1=10
truly 10dulkar...:):)

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