Tuesday, May 10, 2011

US has told Pakistan to act against LeT: Timothy Roemer - The Economic Times

Check out this website I found at economictimes.indiatimes.com

now as the order has come, requested to act soon..

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Baby!!

A worried woman went to her gynecologist and said: 'Doctor, I have a serious problem and desperately need your help! My baby is not even 1 year old and I'm pregnant again. I don't want kids so close together. So the doctor said: 'Ok and what do you want me to do?' She said: 'I want you to end my pregnancy, and I'm counting on your help with this.' The doctor thought for a little, and after some silence he said to the lady: 'I think I have a better solution for your problem. It's less dangerous for you too.' She smiled, thinking that the doctor was going to accept her request. Then he continued: 'You see, in order for you not to have to take care 2 babies at the same time, let's kill the one in your arms. This way, you could rest some before the other one is born. If we're going to kill one of them, it doesn't matter which one it is. There would be no risk for your body if you chose the one in your arms. The lady was horrified and said: 'No doctor! How terrible! It's a crime to kill a child! 'I agree', the doctor replied. 'But you seemed to be OK with it, so I thought maybe that was the best solution.' The doctor smiled, realizing that he had made his point. He convinced the mom that there is no difference in killing a child that's already been born and one that's still in the womb. The crime is the same! If you agree, please SHARE. Together we can help save precious lives! "Love says I sacrifice myself for the good of the other person. Abortion says I sacrifice the other person for the good of myself..." Jesus sacrificed Himself for the good of sinners! That's perfect love! -unkown

Thursday, May 5, 2011

A difficult Judgement

In a small town, a person decided to open up his Bar business, which

was right opposite to the Temple. The Temple and its congregation
started a campaign to block the Bar from opening with petitions and
prayed daily against his business.

Work progressed. However, when it was almost complete and was about
to open a few days later, a strong lightning struck the Bar and it
was burnt to the ground.

The temple folks were rather smug in their outlook after that, till
the Bar owner sued the Temple authorities on the grounds that the
Temple through its congregation and prayers was ultimately responsible
for the demise of his bar shop, either through direct or indirect
actions or means.

In its reply to the court, the temple vehemently denied all
responsibility or any connection that their prayers were reasons to
the bar shop's demise. As the case made its way into court, the judge
looked over the paperwork at the hearing and commented:

'I don't know how I'm going to decide this case, but it appears from
the paperwork, we have a bar owner who believes in the power of
prayer and we have an entire temple and its devotees that doesn't...'

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Obama, Osama and Terror

Finally Obama convinced the whole world that Osama is dead, and he is still the leader of the most brutal terror group! One Osama who killed thousands of Americans who in return killed more Afghanis and others to find One Osama. The same Osama who was helping them in fighting the Soviet army! The whole story you can read at any random website as everyone is writing about it. So what is my question?

My question is not ‘why Pakistan Army was clueless about Osama who was hiding right under their nose in a mansion?’. My question is ‘Why was they not able to protect him if they had protected him for all these years?’ Nothing is clear so far, as all this looks like a dream where we know what happened, but are not at all clear of the facts. The bottom line is, he was found in Pakistan, or rather projected to be found on the Pak soil. Why? No Idea.

Now people are asking the Government of India (via SM) to do something about Dawood Ibrahim. Enter Paksitan and get him? Now that the efficiency of Pakistani defense can be compared to Poonam Pandey’s tall claims, India has nothing to fear!

But what about Local Pakistani people who are now officially tagged as people who give birth to terrorism and protect them as well? They are as innocent as the people of Afghanistan who has nothing to do with whatever was happening at the International Politics. With the present energy crisis and political hollowness, Pak should really pray for their bright future. India and Pakistan both are facing their share of problems, but the moment these countries come in direct conflict or friendship with Mr. America, then the whole world knows what happens!

How can any country allow the defense of some other country to enter and conduct operations without keeping them in the loop? When asked about the operation, most of the leaders of Pakistan were clueless about it.

America is firm as usual.. Pakistan is confused as usual.. and India is clueless as usual. The triangular love story will continue for decades, the only thing we need to look forward is:- Will USA still provide the ‘Aid/Alimony’ to fight terror to Pakistan or they would just ignore them and move on in life! :P

This death is not at all convincing. DNA can now be made to show positive results. Photograph can be Photoshopped to convince, but the truth as usual, will be known to only two people: Mr. Obama and Mr. Julian Assange!

This might be the end of Osama, but is this the end of Terror? Million dollar question for Pakistan, literally!

Saturday, April 30, 2011

Moral

* Kutta, Sher Aur Bandar
*
Ek din ek kutta jungle main raasta kho gaya. Tabhi usne dekha ek sher uskii
taraf aa raha hai. Kutte ki saans rookh gayi. "Aaj to kaam tamaam mera!"
usne socha. Phir usne saamane kuchh sookhi haddiyan padi dekhi. Woh aate hue
sher ki taraf peeth kar ke baith gaya aur ek sookhi hadii ko choosne laga
aur zor zor se bolne laga, "wah! Sher ko khaane ka mazaa hi kuch aur hai. Ek
aur mil jaaye to poori daawat ho jayegi!"
Aur usne zor se dakaar mara. Is bar sher soch mein pad gayaa. Usne socha "ye
kutta to sher ka shikar karta hai! Jaan bacha kara bhago!"
Aur sher wahan se jaan bachaa ke bhaaga.
Ped par baitha ek Bandar yeh sab tamasha dekh raha tha. Usne socha yeh mauka
achha hai sher ko saari kahani bata deta hoon - sher se dosti ho jayegi aur
usse zindagi bhar ke liye jaan ka khatra dur ho jayega.. Woh phataphat sher
ke pichhe bhaaga. Kutte ne Bandar ko jaate hue dekh liya aur samajh gayaki
koi locha hai. Udhar Bandar ne sher ko sab bata diya ki kaise kutte ne use
bewakoof banaya hai. Sher zor se dahada, "chal mere saath abhi uski leela
khatam karta hoon" aur Bandar ko apani peeth par baitha kar sher kutte ki
taraf
lapka.
Can u imagine the quick HR  Management by the DOG...
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
-
 
-
Kutte ne sher ko aate dekha to ek baar phir uskii taraf peeth karke baith
gaya aur zor zor se bolne laga, "Is Bandar ko bhej ke 1 ghanta ho gaya,
saala ek sher phasaa kar nahi la sakta!"
Moral of the story: There are many such monkeys around us, try to identify
them and beware of them.

Friday, April 29, 2011

Brilliant Read

Some, rather most organizations reject his CV today because he has
changed jobs frequently (10 in 14 years). My friend, the ˜job hopper™
(referred here as Mr. JH), does not mind it. well he does not need to
mind it at all. Having worked full-time with 10 employer companies in
just 14 years gives Mr. JH the relaxing edge that most of the ˜company
loyal™ employees are struggling for today. Today, Mr. JH too is laid
off like some other 14-15 year experienced guys “ the difference being
the latter have just worked in 2-3 organizations in the same number of
years. Here are the excerpts of an interview with Mr. JH:

Q: Why have you changed 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: To get financially sound and stable before getting laid off the second time.
Q: So you knew you would be laid off in the year 2009?
A: Well I was laid off first in the year 2002 due to the first global
economic slowdown. I had not got a full-time job before January 2003
when the economy started looking up; so I had struggled for almost a
year without job and with compromises.
Q: Which number of job was that?
A: That was my third job.
Q: So from Jan 2003 to Jan 2009, in 6 years, you have changed 8 jobs
to make the count as 10 jobs in 14 years?
A: I had no other option. In my first 8 years of professional life, I
had worked only for 2 organizations thinking that jobs are deserved
after lot of hard work and one should stay with an employer company to
justify the saying ˜employer loyalty™. But I was an idiot.
Q: Why do you say so?
A: My salary in the first 8 years went up only marginally. I could not
save enough and also, I had thought that I had a ˜permanent™ job, so I
need not worry about ˜what will I do if I lose my job™. I could never
imagine losing a job because of economic slowdown and not because of
my performance. That was January 2002.
Q: Can you brief on what happened between January 2003 and 2009.
A: Well, I had learnt my lessons of being ˜company loyal™ and not
˜money earning and saving loyal™. But then you can save enough only
when you earn enough. So I shifted my loyalty towards money making and
saving “ I changed 8 jobs in 6 years assuring all my interviewers
about my stability.
Q: So you lied to your interviewers; you had already planned to change
the job for which you were being interviewed on a particular day?
A: Yes, you can change jobs only when the market is up and companies
are hiring. You tell me “ can I get a job now because of the slowdown?
No. So one should change jobs for higher salaries only when the market
is up because that is the only time when companies hire and can afford
the expected salaries.
Q: What have you gained by doing such things?
A: That's the question I was waiting for. In Jan 2003, I had a fixed
salary (without variables) of say Rs. X p.a. In January 2009, my
salary was 8X. So assuming my salary was Rs.3 lakh p.a. in Jan 2003,
my last drawn salary in Jan 2009 was Rs.24 lakh p.a. (without
variable). I never bothered about variable as I had no intention to
stay for 1 year and go through the appraisal process to wait for the
company to give me a hike.
Q: So you decided on your own hike?
A: Yes, in 2003, I could see the slowdown coming again in future like
it had happened in 2001-02. Though I was not sure by when the next
slowdown would come, I was pretty sure I wanted a ˜debt-free™ life
before being laid off again. So I planned my hike targets on a yearly
basis without waiting for the year to complete.
Q: So are you debt-free now?
A: Yes, I earned so much by virtue of job changes for money and spent
so little that today I have a loan free 2 BR flat (1200 sq.. feet)
plus a loan free big car without bothering about any EMIs. I am laid
off too but I do not complain at all. If I have laid off companies for
money, it is OK if a company lays me off because of lack of money.
Q: Who is complaining?
A: All those guys who are not getting a job to pay their EMIs off are
complaining. They had made fun of me saying I am a job hopper and do
not have any company loyalty. Now I ask them what they gained by their
company loyalty; they too are laid off like me and pass comments to me
“ why will you bother about us, you are already debt-free. They were
still in the bracket of 12-14 lakh p.a. when they were laid off.
Q: What is your advice to professionals?
A: Like Narayan Murthy had said “ love your job and not your company
because you never know when your company will stop loving you. In the
same lines, love yourself and your family needs more than the
company's needs. Companies can keep coming and going; family will
always remain the same. Make money for yourself first and
simultaneously make money for the company, not the other way around.
Q: What is your biggest pain point with companies?
A: When a company does well, its CEO will address the entire company
saying, ˜well done guys, it is YOUR company, keep up the hard work, I
am with you. But when the slowdown happens and the company does not do
so well, the same CEO will say, œIt is MY company and to save the
company, I have to take tough decisions including asking people to go.
So think about your financial stability first; when you get laid off,
your kids will complain to you and not your boss.

Must Read

If   you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have   been
as sharp as this policeman. He was being  cross-examined  by a defense
attorney during a felony  trial. The lawyer was  trying to undermine
the police  officer's credibility...

Q:  'Officer  -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?'
A:   'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching  the
description of the offender, running several blocks   away.'
Q:   'Officer -- who provided this description?'
A:   'The officer who responded to the  scene.'
Q:   'A fellow officer provided the description of this  so-called
offender. Do you trustyour fellow officers?'
A:   'Yes, sir. With my life.'
Q:   'With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do  you  have
a room where you change your clothes in  preparation for  your daily
duties?'
A:   'Yes sir, we do!'
Q:   'And do you have a locker in the room?'
A:   'Yes sir, I do.'

Q: 'And do you  have a lock on your   locker?'
A:   'Yes sir.'
Q:   'Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow  officers  with
your life, you find it necessary to lock  your locker in  a room you
share with these same  officers?'
A:   'You see, sir -- we share the building with the court   complex,
and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk   through that room.'

The   courtroom EXPLODED with laughter, and a  prompt recess  was
called. The officer on the stand has  been nominated for  this year's
'Best Comeback' line --  and we think he'll   win.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Rajni Mobile

NOKIA planning to launch 
Rajnikanth 'R' series in 2012
Features:
*20sims
*10yr battery backup
*1 ZB memory
*1000 Megapixles Cam
*TV
*Oven
*Washing Machine
*Fridge
*AC
*Mini Rocket Launcher
*Mini AK-47
and the new special feature 24G which is better than 3G
In this u can pul-out  the person from phon & talk directly!!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Anna Hazaare

1. Who is Anna Hazare? An ex-army man. Fought 1965 Indo-Pak War
2. What's so special about him? He built a village Ralegaon Siddhi in
Ahamad Nagar district, Maharashtra
3. So what? This village is a self-sustained model village. Energy is
produced in the village itself from solar power, biofuel and wind
mills. In 1975, it used to be a poverty clad village. Now it is one of
the richest village in India. It has become a model for
self-sustained, eco-friendly & harmonic village.
4. Ok,...? This guy, Anna Hazare was awarded Padma Bhushan and is a
known figure for his social activities.
5. Really, what is he fighting for? He is supporting a cause, the
amendment of a law to curb corruption in India.
6. How that can be possible? He is advocating for a Bil, The Jan
Lokpal Bill (The Citizen Ombudsman Bill), that will form an autonomous
authority who will make politicians (ministers), beurocrats (IAS/IPS)
accountable for their deeds.
8. It's an entirely new thing right..? In 1972, the bill was proposed
by then Law minister Mr. Shanti Bhushan. Since then it has been
neglected by the politicians and some are trying to change the bill to
suit thier theft (corruption).
7. Oh.. He is going on a hunger strike for that whole thing of passing
a Bill ! How can that be possible in such a short span of time? The
first thing he is asking for is: the government should come forward
and announce that the bill is going to be passed. Next, they make a
joint committee to DRAFT the JAN LOKPAL BILL. 50% goverment
participation and 50% public participation. Because you cant trust the
government entirely for making such a bill which does not suit them.
8. Fine, What will happen when this bill is passed? A LokPal will be
appointed at the centre. He will have an autonomous charge, say like
the Election Commission of India. In each and every state, Lokayukta
will be appointed. The job is to bring all alleged party to trial in
case of corruptions within 1 year. Within 2 years, the guilty will be
punished. Not like, Bofors scam or Bhopal Gas Tragedy case, that has
been going for last 25 years without any result.
9. Is he alone? Whoelse is there in the fight with Anna Hazare? Baba
Ramdev, Ex. IPS Kiran Bedi, Social Activist Swami Agnivesh, RTI
activist Arvind Kejriwal and many more. Prominent personalities like
Aamir Khan is supporting his cause.
10. Ok, got it. What can I do? At least we can spread the message.
How? Putting status message, links, video, changing profile pics.   At
least we can support Anna Hazare and the cause for uprooting
corruption from India.  At least we can hope that his Hunger Strike
does not go in vain. At least we can pray for his good health.
Thanks for reading.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Facts

Jersey no.10
Age 37=3+7=10
ht 5'5"=5+5=10
WC winning date
2/4/2011=2+4+2+0+1+1=10
WC after 28 yrs=2+8=10
Strike rate in WC=91=9+1=10
truly 10dulkar...:):)

Sent from my Nokia phone

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Captain's knock on World Cup 2011

I was just wondering about the Captain's contributions towards their respective teams. Check this out:-

1 .KC Sangakkara (SL) 6 match - 363 runs 
2.Andrew strauss (ENG)6 match -329 runs 
3.Afridi (pak) 6 match -21 wickets 
4.Grame smith (SA)6 match -155 Runs 
5.Dhoni (IND) 5 match -96 run ( not even 20 avg) 
6.Ponting (AUS)6 Match - 106 run( not even 20 avg)

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

To Sachin Tendulkar Fans..

"I want my son to become Sachin Tendulkar." -Brian Lara(WI)

''V did not lose 2 a team called India, v lost 2 a man called Sachin'' - Mark Taylor(aus)

'Nothing bad can happen 2 us if v were on a plane in India wit Sachin Tendulkar on it.''-Hashim Amla(SA)

''He can play that leg glance with a walking stick also.-Waqar Younis(Pak)

''There r 2 kind of batsman in the world. 1 Sachin Tendulkar and 2. all the others .-Andy Flower(ZIM)

"I have seen God. He bats at no.4 for India in tests.-Matthew Hayden(AUS.)

"I c myself when i c Sachin batting.-Don Bradman(AUS)

"Do your crime when Sachin is batting, bcos even God is busy watching his batting. -Australian Fan

Barack Obama - "I don't know about cricket but still I watch cricket to see Sachin play..Not b'coz I love his play
its b'coz I want to know the reason why my country's production goes down by 5 percent when he's in batting"...

Friends

When you rise up, your friends know who you are. When you fall down, you know who your friends are! True & relevant.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Kaun Banega "CHOR-PATI".........Quite Relevant

Kaun Banega "CHOR-PATI".........

You all know KBC is Good Business. But have you ever pondered how well?????

Any guesses?????

Let's see ……..

Airtel is charging Rs.6/- per SMS sent for this contest. Assuming there are only 100 entries from say 10 cities of some 20 districts and 20 states ….....

6(Rs. per SMS) x 100(entries) x 10(cities) x 20(districts) x 20(states) i.e. = 6 x 100 x 10 x 20 x 20 = Rs.24, 00,000/-.

Rs.24 lakhs in just 20 minutes (from people trying for the Rs.2 lakhs cash prize). Imagine the scenario if 1000 entries try out from 100 cities?

The figure simply grows by 2 more zeroes and yields a whopping Rs.24 crores !!!!!

And it does not stop there. In practice, it could be another multiple of 100 or a multiple of 1000 on an average. In that case, it is 24 x 100 crores earnings in just 20 minutes on every episode!!!

And the prize money: A mere Rs.2 crores !!!!! (and from whose pocket ?????)

Smart Business By Siddharth Basu! And the best part of the above calculation is just the SMS earning!!!!! What about the Ad money ?????

A rough annual profit calculation goes like this:

(2400 x 5 x 4) (episode/month) x 12 = Rs.5, 76,000 crores.

Let even 50% get dissolved in taxes and other payments; still, you will be left with (which includes even the meagre Rs.480 crores of prize money, i.e., if every episode bags Rs.2 crores prize) – Rs.2, 88,000/- crores profit !!!!! (Only from SMS).

Therefore, a Very Simple Question: "KAUN BANEGA CROREPATI" and your options are –

A) SONY TV

B) AIRTEL

C) AMITABH BACHAN

D) SIDDHARTH BASU

 

Computerji, iska jawab bataiye....

Answer: All FOUR..!!!!

 

Now you know why AB gets so emotional when episodes end ???

Japanese Culture

Foreign observers are noting with curiosity and wonder that the Japanese people in disaster-plagued areas are not looting for desperately-needed supplies like bottled water. This behavior contrasts sharply with what has so often happened in the wake of catastrophes elsewhere, such as Haiti, New Orleans, Chile, and the UK, to name only a few.  Most people chalk up the extraordinary good behavior to Japanese culture, noting the legendary politeness of Japanese people in everyday life. 

11-yr-old Rajkot boy scores full marks in Microsoft exam

A city boy has become the youngest student to equal the world record of obtaining full 1,000 marks in an online computer exam conducted by US-based multinational Microsoft Corp. 

Akshit Jayesh Dhruv, a Class V student, appeared in the exam on March 16 and obtained full marks, said Chirag Kothari, Centre Head of Inside Tomorrow Computer Academy, where the 11-year-old studied. 

Nearly 17,000 candidates, from as many as 119 countries and studying from Standard III to post graduates, appeared in the exam in which Akshit was ranked first, Kothari said. 

Dum Maaro Dum Lyrics

Hey, Tu Phir Dekh Raha Hai
Aaj Aankh Sek Raha Hai, Kal Haath Sekega
Aaj Di Chod Raha Hai, Kal Khudi Rokega
Aaj Mere Liye Chair Kheech Raha Hai
Kal Meri Skirt Kheechega
Kheechega Ke Nahin Hun

Akkad Bakkad Bambay Bo
Assi Nabbe Poore Sau
Sau Rupeya Ka Banjoli
Do Sau Hum Ho Udanchi
(Phir Kyun Main Tu Kar Reh Tain Tu)

Unche Se Uncha Banda, Potty Pe Baithe Nanga
Phir Kaahe Ki Society, Saali Kaahe Ka Paakhanda
Bheje Se Kaleje Se, Kalaje Ke Kalaje Se
Mit Jaaye Hum Maroge Toh Jeeyoge Dum Maaro Dum
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram

(Duniya Mein Humko Nahin Aata
Duniya Mein Humdar Nahin Aata
Humdum Ki Parwah Kare Kyun
Sapne Hamara Nahin Aata)

Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram

Kya Hai Kahani Tere Paap Ki
Topi Hai Pyaare Har Naam Ki
Khuli Hai Supermarket Baap Ki
Kya Hai Pasand Toh Aap Ki
Andar Ke Bandar Se Ho Guftagu Si Ik Baat
Thi Justaju Si Ik Baat
Ho Guftagu Si Ik Baat
(Phir Kyun Main Tu Kar Reh Tain Tu)

Unche Se Uncha Banda, Potty Pe Baithe Nanga
Phir Kaahe Ki Society, Saali Kaahe Ka Paakhanda
Bheje Se Kaleje Se, Kalaje Ke Kalaje Se
Mit Jaaye Hum Maroge Toh Jeeyoge Dum Maaro Dum
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna 

Life!!

Our Birth is our 

Opening Balance

Our Death is our Closing Balance

Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities

Our 

Creative Ideas
 are our Assets

Heart is our 

Current Asset

Soul is our 

Fixed Asset

Brain is our 

Fixed Deposit

Thoughts are our Current Account

Achievements are our Capital

Character & Morals, our Stock-in-Trade

Friends are our General Reserves

Values & Behavior are our Goodwill

Patience is our Interest Earned

Love is our Dividend

Children are our Bonus Issues

Education is Brands / Patents

Knowledge is our 

Investment

Experience is our Premium Account

Our Aim is, 2 Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately…
& the Goal is, 2 get the ‘Best Presented Accounts’ Award!

Friday, March 18, 2011

Ditto for India

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help ~ Ronald Reagan

Thursday, March 17, 2011

drunken fact..

1 Ltr =1000ML
1/2 Ltr= 500ML 1/4 Ltr= 250ML But
"Daru"
1Full=750ML
1Half=360ML
1Quater=180ML
Why?
Kyuki govt pinewalo ko chutya samajhti hai
"JAGO GRAHAK JAGO"

Sent from my Nokia phone

Nehra jokes..

Couple silent in bed.

Wife thinks :
Why is he not talking to me?
Is he thinking of another woman?
Does he like someone else?
Is he seeing someone?
Don't I appeal to him anymore?
Are wrinkles showing on my face?
Is he trying to dump me?
Is he now finding me ugly?
Have I put on weight at the wrong places?
Does my make up repel him these days.
Is he upset with my nagging?
WHY IS HE UPSET?

Husband thinks :Why the hell did Dhoni give the last over to Nehra? :O X_X

Sent from my Nokia phone

Chanakya said..

Chanakya said:
"Don't share ur top secrets with anyone; b'coz, if u cant keep ur secrets with u, dont expect somebody to keep ur secrets with them."

Then it will suck out all the gossip fun that we have.. Kya Chanakya, how boring! :P Sent from my Nokia phone

Sympathy..

3 log marne k bad swarag k darwaje par pahuche..
.
1st-me pujari hu mene aapki zindagi bhar sewa ki mujhe andar aane do.
.
God-next.
.
2nd-me doctor Hu. maine zindagi bhar logo ki sewa ki mujhe andar aane do..
.
God-next.
.
3rd-meh shaadi shuddha hoon....
.
God-Bas kar pagle rulayega kya, chal andar aaja.

Sent from my Nokia phone

Couple Jokes..

Couple silent in bed.

Wife thinks :
Why is he not talking to me?
Is he thinking of another woman?
Does he like someone else?
Is he seeing someone?
Don't I appeal to him anymore?
Are wrinkles showing on my face?
Is he trying to dump me?
Is he now finding me ugly?
Have I put on weight at the wrong places?
Does my make up repel him these days.
Is he upset with my nagging?
WHY IS HE UPSET?

Husband thinks :Why the hell did Dhoni give the last over to Nehra? Sent from my Nokia phone

Live Tension Free

Earth weighs 6.6 Septilion Tons,
Don't make it heavier by carrying tensions & heavy heart!
Stay light,Laugh a lot,Love much, & Enjoy each moments. Gud mrng n a tension free day ahead

Sent from my Nokia phone

Anatidaephobia.. Do you have it?

A KFC restaurant in Cairo is completely staffed and managed by deaf people.

This Kentucky Fried Chicken is entirely run by the hearing-impaired, from the cashiers, to the cooks, even the managers! Another pair of deaf branches have also been opened in Pakistan. The venture provides over 35 jobs at each branch, which is an invaluable asset for people with this sort of disability because otherwise they would have a harder time working in this predominantly hearing-person industry. 

It is easy to assume that the hearing/non-hearing language barrier would be difficult to overcome for your average customer, but the KFC makes things easier with a user-friendly pictorial chart which patrons can use to order. And let’s be honest, it’s not like ordering fast food from hearing people is always a walk in the park. 

Pehchaan Kaun

He started writing early in life and published his first book at age 17, Main aur Woh — a ‘conversation with himself’, inspired by Frederich Nietzsche’s Thus Spake Zarathustra,[

3]subsequently he has published two more books.

After his schooling, he did his B.Sc. and Post Graduation in Physics, thereafter he did his MBA from Institute of Management Technology, GhaziabadIndia. During his MBA education he decided to make his career in advertising.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Another fact

According to the Children in Nature website, "Children can identify up to 1,000 corporate logos, but fewer than 10 plants or animals native to their backyards."

3 Year Alcoholic Boy Admitted

A 3 year old boy has been admitted to hospital for alcoholism. The unnamed child is being treated in a West Midlands hospital when it was discovered that he had been given alcohol regularly for at least 6 months.

3 Year Alcoholic Boy Admitted to Hospital

The Heart of England NHS Trust identified a string of underage children with serious drinking problems in a study last year and this was the youngest and most troubling case. Doctor’s fear that the boy will suffer withdrawal problems such as mood swings and the shakes, but could – more seriously – have suffered brain damage.

Nicolay Sorensen from Alcohol Concern said:

“To be diagnosed alcoholic, it’s possible this child would have shown a physical dependency. ’They would have had to ingest enough to cause withdrawal symptoms. It is a horrifying case.”

No details of the child’s background have been given, but the case will serve to highlight concerns about the availability of cheap alcohol for home use through supermarkets – and comes on the day that drink charities have pulled out of the Government’s proposed ‘alcohol responsibility‘ deal.

We’re in two minds on the issue, being both fans of the drink and opponents of people being sick outside our house. But using extreme outlying cases like this as a basis of or justification for law is rarely helpful. It’s also worth nothing that, despite the horror stories and tabloid front pages, we’ve been drinking less booze in Britain for several years now, so perhaps some of the bluster and hand-wringing is a little misplaced.

No comfort to the 3 year old boy, of course. Godspeed little man – and hope the rest of your life works out better for you.

[img courtesy: Wikimedia]

July 2011 - 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays, 5 Sundays

Outline
Message claims that July 2011 has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays and that this combination of days only occurs once in 823 years.

Brief Analysis
It is perfectly true that July 2011 has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. However, such a combination occurs far more often than every 823 years. The last occurrence was in July 2005 while the next occurrence will take place in July 2016. The message is just a revamped version of very similar- and equally erroneous - messages about August and October 2010. 

Pehchaan Kaun?

He studied at St. Vincent's High SchoolPune in the state of Maharashtra in South West India; and then at Fergusson College, Pune. In 1960, he joined the National Defence Academy, Pune, and in 1964, he joined the Air Force Flying Colleges in Jodhpur and Allahabad. He served the Indian Air Force between 1964–1972 and was a recipient of eight medals in his career[3]. After a premature discharge from the Air Force, he ran a small fast food shop in Pune and was spotted by Sanjay Gandhi during one of his trips there and was one of the young people at that time that he convinced to join politics with the Congress Party. He has served effectively in various capacities with the Congress since and is now one of the wealthiest businessman as well in Pune even from his known sources of income.

Who is he?

Temporary

I got this SMS from a very good friend of mine. 

Isn't it surprising that we want every thing permanent for a temporary life! Strange but true.

I just want a permanent job with permanent growth. Want to make some permanent property and live in permanent peace! :) 

And the poor snake dies..

LONDON: A snake attacked an Israeli model during a sexy photoshoot by biting into her surgically enhanced breast and later died from silicone poisoning. 

Orit Fox, a B-list model and actress initially looked comfortable during the shoot in Tel Aviv, wrapping the massive boa constrictor around her legs, waist and neck while doing her best to look sexy, reports the Daily Mail. 

In a figure hugging red and white striped dress, which revealed maximum cleavage, she gamely tried to take their bonding to the next level by licking the snake's face. As she manoeuvered the animal into position for the 'kiss' Fox loosened her grip on its neck, and after being licked the reptile reacted angrily. 

It aimed straight for Fox's prized assets and sunk its teeth deep into her left breast. An assistantrushed in to help her pull the snake off and after a few seconds of struggle the creature released its grip. The peroxide-blonde model was rushed to a nearby hospital and given a tetanus shot. However, the snake wasn't so lucky and died from silicone poisoning.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Dard Ke Phool Bhi Khilte Hai

Dard ke phool bhi khilte hai bikhar jaate hai,
ZaKhm kaise bhi ho kuch roz mein bhar jaate hai,

Us dariche mein bhi ab koi nahi aur hum bhi,
Sar jhukaye huye chup chaap guzar jaate hai,

Raasta roke khaDi hai yahi ulajhan kab se,
Koi poochhe to kahe kya ki kidhar jaate hai,

Naram awaaz bhali baatein mohazzab lahaje,
Pahli baarish mein hi ye rang utar jaate hai

Sachin Tendulkar

Liverpool FC, an English professional football club, bid goodbye to its 17 years of association with a famous beer brand Carlsberg (Probably the best beer brand in the world) last year. Back in India, one of the greatest batsmen in the history of Indian Cricket declined an offer to endorse a top liquor brand. Sports world is truly moving towards a healthier lifestyle; or rather they have taken responsibility to guide the youths globally. How I wish I was right. Both of these deals may have same consequences, but they don’t have common intention. Liverpool dumped Carlsberg for a better offer from Standard Chartered and the Indian batting maestro dumped the offer for his values, social responsibilities and a promise made to his late father, Mr. Ramesh Tendulkar.

The legendary Sachin Tendulkar has proved his skills on the cricket field, but his gesture is worth appreciating. Soon after the news, Maharashtra Government appreciated the master-blaster’s decision of choosing principles over money. Maharashtra Government very cleverly appreciated him but has not adhered to his principles. Sachin has sacrificed Rs. 20 crore offered to him, but Maharashtra Government is not willing to sacrifice the lucrative tax revenues. They allow licensing of liquor and then initiate de-addiction policy as a social service.

I know that I have influence on youngsters and I don’t feel that I want them to think if I should endorse these products I want them to use them,” said the famous footballer Pele who was also known as the Black Pearl. The little master has followed the same path and has kept his word. His father had told him that people will offer lot of money for ads but he should never endorse brands that are not good for youngsters. He had promised his father that he will never endorse alcohol and Tobacco brands ever in his life. A true example of an icon indeed.

For the country like India, where most of the young people follow one ‘Ma’ i.e. Cinema; and Cricket is considered a religion, both these medium affect and inspire the citizens. Sachin Tendulkar’s action is surely an example set for the legendary actors like Mr. Amitabh Bachchan who flaunted his cigar for ‘Family’ or recently to Mrs. Aishwarya Rai Bachchan who was seen doing the same on the posters of ‘Guzarish’.

On the other hand, Cigarette and Liquor industry are very important tax revenue hubs. Consumption of Beer has jumped 51% from 70 million cases in 2002 to 105 million cases in 2006. The consumption of Indian made Foreign Liquor (IMFL) grew 53% to 115 million cases. Between April to August end this year, the Delhi Government raked Rs. 776.56 crore excise tax on liquor. It provides employment to many. It is like raising a question ‘is the very existence of Tobacco and Liquor Industry ethical?’ Every citizen of India has got a right to consume what has been offered legally. After all India is a free country.

MS Dhoni, who was MTV youth icon in 2006, has happily signed the deal of Rs.26 crore for three years with UB group. Sachin, as usual, has gone beyond this.  With this step, he has become an icon for the youth icons, both off and on field.

I also feel that one cannot force anyone to do anything. After the rejection from Sachin, the offer will go to some other celebrity who will happily endorse it. Neither will it make any difference to the liquor firm, nor will it make a deep enough impact for drunkards to stop drinking. What if Sachin had endorsed the ad and donated Rs. 20 crore towards the making of a hospital or initiating some social welfare programs? The money intoxicated in the liquor world would have entered a better world for progress of mankind.

Let’s raise a toast for the inspirational decision!

‘Cheers’ to Sachin!

Japan - Be Careful, if it rains..

Be Careful, If it rains 

  
There was a nuclear blast 4:30pm Sunday in Fukushima Japan. If it rains today or in the next few days, DO NOT GO UNDER THE RAIN. If you get caught out, use an umbrella or raincoat, even if it's only a drizzle. Radioactive particles, which may cause burns, alopecia or even cancer, may be in the rain. 
  
BBC flash news : 
Japan government confirms radiation leak at Fukushima nuclear plants. Asian countries should take necessary precautions. If it rains, remain indoors first 24hours, close doors n windows, swab neck skin with beta-dine where thyroid area is, radiation hits thyroid first. Take extra precautions, radiation may hit Philippines starting 4pm (Pinas time) today! 
  
PLEASE PASS THIS MESSAGE. 

Hello Guys!!

Hello Guys,

Just getting used to few of the tools here. 

Enjoy!!

apoorvv

I am Mallu

1.I am not a Mallu I am a Malayali 2.Shakeela is not from my state 3.Sreesanth is from my state,but I hate him. 4.My mother tongue is not Tamil. 5.I may like Rajnikanth or Shah Rukh Khan.....but I always prefer Mohanlal 6.I love cricket...but I love footb
...all more 7.I am an Indian....yes Sachin is God..... 8.All my uncles are not in Dubai... 9.I am not always a Nair 10.I am an alcoholic,unless I am gay impotent or just plainly scared of mom. 11.I may or may not be Marxist,but essentially a socialist 12.I may not laugh at your joke...no offenses..blame it on Jagathy Sreekumar..I have already heard them. 13.You may not laugh at my joke...no offenses...blame it on Sreenivasan...you would not understand. 14.I am a non vegetarian.....and Yes I eat beef 15.If you find me and another malayali shouting at each other animatedly at the top of our voices calling each other names...never bother we are just having a healthy discussion on Mammootty and Mohanlal. 16.When I was a student....I never bunked...we just called a strike... 17.Yes I use a lungi....and play football wearing it.....now you can't beat that. 18.I don't understand Kadhakali....... 19.I don't like you much,I may look down upon you...can't help it....that is how we are made.... 20.When you are talking to me....never mention Poland....again blame it on Sreenivasan..you wouldn't understand :P
By: Es Saji

Open Letter To Sachin

Dear Sachin,     

I feel sad. Even after 22 years of playing for the country, you are still expected to win matches on your own. We forget that apart from you there are 10 more players in the team. You have been the run machine in World Cups with an average ...of 60.  Even today while you yet again proved your class with a 111 the others around took it easy. You chased the ball in the outfield and ensured that your throws landed on top of the bails. Others preferred to drop catches or go back to the dressing room for a 'rest' while a substitute fielder came in.    Sachin, the current Indian cricket team doesn't deserve you. They don't know what it is like to give one's blood and sweat for this nation of a billion people. For them fame and money has come to easy and undeserving - not commensurate to the 'supposed talent' that they posses. Do you remember what you had said to Tom Alter in that interview in 1989? "I just want to play cricket".     Sachin, let me also not hide the truth - you are not my favorite cricketer - but one plays favorites only with humans - not with Gods for they are revered, emulated and looked at in awe...   [We expect Sachin to win this cup for us. But what about the other players? Are they supposed to be playing ludo in the dressing room? I hope that the rest of the team wake up and realize that they are not there to 'play' in the tournament, they are supposed to 'win' it - not for themselves, not for India but for the greatest Indian to have lived - Sachin Tendulkar.     P.S: In the 1992, Hero Cup semi-final in Eden Gardens Kolkata (India Vs. SA), SA needed 6 runs to win off the last over. Tendulkar snatched the ball from Azhar and bowled a magnificent over to win that match for us. (He gave away only 3 runs). Maybe our team needs to watch that over to know what guts and glory are all about.]     Sachin, I hope we win the final in Wankhede. If we don't a billion people can only hang their heads in shame and ask for your forgiveness.   Regards, One of your undying fans who: 1. Still goes crazy when you hit that straight drive and show us the manufacturer's name on the bat. 2. Stayed awake late into the night before my end terms to watch that 100 in Sharjah in the midst of that sandstorm. 3. Relished every shot that you played to decimate Warne in 1998 and then Shoaib Akhtar in that 2003 World Cup against Pakistan. 4. Will stop watching cricket after you retire.      
By: Telugu

Aakhiri

Jaagey hai der takk humein, Kuch der sone do.. 
Thodisi raat aur hai, subah toh hone do..

Aadhey adhoorey khwaab jo, poore na ho sake.. 
Ek baar firse nind mein woh khwaab bone do..

Jaagey hai der takk humein, fursat se marne do.. 
Thodisi saans baaki hai, sukoonn se lene do..

Jalle hue khwaab the mere, raakh bhi na bann paaye.. 
ek baar firse maut ka, khuraak hone do..

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Mumbai

Mumbai is the land of opportunities.. Careers.. Dreams.. Success.. Failure.. Poverty..

Sometimes I become speechless when I talk of mumbai.. Mumbai is mumbai..

You have no words to express it.. Mumbaikars have no words to express it.. May be because they really can't express it, or may be they just can't keep their words..

That's when you realize that mumbai is actually fake.. hollow..

Anyway, words and mumbai don't go hand in hand.. Forget about professional commitments, don't believe in their promises too..

Because that is mumbai.. Speechless.. Mute..

Sent from my Nokia phone

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Aakhiri..

Jaagey hai der takk humein, Kuch der sone do..
Thodisi raat aur hai, subah toh hone do..

Aadhey adhoorey khwaab jo, poore na ho sake..
Ek baar firse nind mein woh khwaab bone do..

Jaagey hai der takk humein, fursat se marne do..
Thodisi saans baaki hai, sukoonn se lene do..

Jalle hue khwaab the mere, raakh bhi na bann paaye..
ek baar firse maut ka, khuraak hone do..

Sent from my Nokia phone

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Suraj a.k.a Nagesh of Jalna

Have you heard of it?

The participant of Roadies 8.0

Read somewhere that he fooled the (not so) deadly duo raghu-Rajiv and (not so) stud ranvijay.

If this is true, it will directly erase the tag of inserting 'fake' participant on the show.

The image of the show is improved at the cost of intelligence displayed by the interviewer.

Interesting publicity!

Sent from my Nokia phone

Bus

Compromise is everywhere. The moment you think of doing something that you would not have preferred then you are on the right path to compromise.

Such is the case at Agarkar Bus Stop. There are two buses which takes you to Mulund. One is 422(air conditioned, 35rs ticket) and the other is 396(16rs ticket).

The queue for 422 is on an average of 20ppl at the peak hours while 396 has around 120ppl in queue. The catch is, if you stand in the queue of 120ppl the chances of you reaching the destination on time are more.

Obviously, the frequency of 422 is very less. But you have to take a decision and trust me its a very tough decision when you are very tired and want to hit the bed asap.

Sent from my Nokia phone