Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Captain's knock on World Cup 2011

I was just wondering about the Captain's contributions towards their respective teams. Check this out:-

1 .KC Sangakkara (SL) 6 match - 363 runs 
2.Andrew strauss (ENG)6 match -329 runs 
3.Afridi (pak) 6 match -21 wickets 
4.Grame smith (SA)6 match -155 Runs 
5.Dhoni (IND) 5 match -96 run ( not even 20 avg) 
6.Ponting (AUS)6 Match - 106 run( not even 20 avg)

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

To Sachin Tendulkar Fans..

"I want my son to become Sachin Tendulkar." -Brian Lara(WI)

''V did not lose 2 a team called India, v lost 2 a man called Sachin'' - Mark Taylor(aus)

'Nothing bad can happen 2 us if v were on a plane in India wit Sachin Tendulkar on it.''-Hashim Amla(SA)

''He can play that leg glance with a walking stick also.-Waqar Younis(Pak)

''There r 2 kind of batsman in the world. 1 Sachin Tendulkar and 2. all the others .-Andy Flower(ZIM)

"I have seen God. He bats at no.4 for India in tests.-Matthew Hayden(AUS.)

"I c myself when i c Sachin batting.-Don Bradman(AUS)

"Do your crime when Sachin is batting, bcos even God is busy watching his batting. -Australian Fan

Barack Obama - "I don't know about cricket but still I watch cricket to see Sachin play..Not b'coz I love his play
its b'coz I want to know the reason why my country's production goes down by 5 percent when he's in batting"...

Friends

When you rise up, your friends know who you are. When you fall down, you know who your friends are! True & relevant.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Kaun Banega "CHOR-PATI".........Quite Relevant

Kaun Banega "CHOR-PATI".........

You all know KBC is Good Business. But have you ever pondered how well?????

Any guesses?????

Let's see ……..

Airtel is charging Rs.6/- per SMS sent for this contest. Assuming there are only 100 entries from say 10 cities of some 20 districts and 20 states ….....

6(Rs. per SMS) x 100(entries) x 10(cities) x 20(districts) x 20(states) i.e. = 6 x 100 x 10 x 20 x 20 = Rs.24, 00,000/-.

Rs.24 lakhs in just 20 minutes (from people trying for the Rs.2 lakhs cash prize). Imagine the scenario if 1000 entries try out from 100 cities?

The figure simply grows by 2 more zeroes and yields a whopping Rs.24 crores !!!!!

And it does not stop there. In practice, it could be another multiple of 100 or a multiple of 1000 on an average. In that case, it is 24 x 100 crores earnings in just 20 minutes on every episode!!!

And the prize money: A mere Rs.2 crores !!!!! (and from whose pocket ?????)

Smart Business By Siddharth Basu! And the best part of the above calculation is just the SMS earning!!!!! What about the Ad money ?????

A rough annual profit calculation goes like this:

(2400 x 5 x 4) (episode/month) x 12 = Rs.5, 76,000 crores.

Let even 50% get dissolved in taxes and other payments; still, you will be left with (which includes even the meagre Rs.480 crores of prize money, i.e., if every episode bags Rs.2 crores prize) – Rs.2, 88,000/- crores profit !!!!! (Only from SMS).

Therefore, a Very Simple Question: "KAUN BANEGA CROREPATI" and your options are –

A) SONY TV

B) AIRTEL

C) AMITABH BACHAN

D) SIDDHARTH BASU

 

Computerji, iska jawab bataiye....

Answer: All FOUR..!!!!

 

Now you know why AB gets so emotional when episodes end ???

Japanese Culture

Foreign observers are noting with curiosity and wonder that the Japanese people in disaster-plagued areas are not looting for desperately-needed supplies like bottled water. This behavior contrasts sharply with what has so often happened in the wake of catastrophes elsewhere, such as Haiti, New Orleans, Chile, and the UK, to name only a few.  Most people chalk up the extraordinary good behavior to Japanese culture, noting the legendary politeness of Japanese people in everyday life. 

11-yr-old Rajkot boy scores full marks in Microsoft exam

A city boy has become the youngest student to equal the world record of obtaining full 1,000 marks in an online computer exam conducted by US-based multinational Microsoft Corp. 

Akshit Jayesh Dhruv, a Class V student, appeared in the exam on March 16 and obtained full marks, said Chirag Kothari, Centre Head of Inside Tomorrow Computer Academy, where the 11-year-old studied. 

Nearly 17,000 candidates, from as many as 119 countries and studying from Standard III to post graduates, appeared in the exam in which Akshit was ranked first, Kothari said. 

Dum Maaro Dum Lyrics

Hey, Tu Phir Dekh Raha Hai
Aaj Aankh Sek Raha Hai, Kal Haath Sekega
Aaj Di Chod Raha Hai, Kal Khudi Rokega
Aaj Mere Liye Chair Kheech Raha Hai
Kal Meri Skirt Kheechega
Kheechega Ke Nahin Hun

Akkad Bakkad Bambay Bo
Assi Nabbe Poore Sau
Sau Rupeya Ka Banjoli
Do Sau Hum Ho Udanchi
(Phir Kyun Main Tu Kar Reh Tain Tu)

Unche Se Uncha Banda, Potty Pe Baithe Nanga
Phir Kaahe Ki Society, Saali Kaahe Ka Paakhanda
Bheje Se Kaleje Se, Kalaje Ke Kalaje Se
Mit Jaaye Hum Maroge Toh Jeeyoge Dum Maaro Dum
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram

(Duniya Mein Humko Nahin Aata
Duniya Mein Humdar Nahin Aata
Humdum Ki Parwah Kare Kyun
Sapne Hamara Nahin Aata)

Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram

Kya Hai Kahani Tere Paap Ki
Topi Hai Pyaare Har Naam Ki
Khuli Hai Supermarket Baap Ki
Kya Hai Pasand Toh Aap Ki
Andar Ke Bandar Se Ho Guftagu Si Ik Baat
Thi Justaju Si Ik Baat
Ho Guftagu Si Ik Baat
(Phir Kyun Main Tu Kar Reh Tain Tu)

Unche Se Uncha Banda, Potty Pe Baithe Nanga
Phir Kaahe Ki Society, Saali Kaahe Ka Paakhanda
Bheje Se Kaleje Se, Kalaje Ke Kalaje Se
Mit Jaaye Hum Maroge Toh Jeeyoge Dum Maaro Dum
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Ram
Dum Maaro Dum
Mit Jaaye Gham
Bolo Subaha Shaam
Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Hare Krishna 

Life!!

Our Birth is our 

Opening Balance

Our Death is our Closing Balance

Our Prejudiced Views are our Liabilities

Our 

Creative Ideas
 are our Assets

Heart is our 

Current Asset

Soul is our 

Fixed Asset

Brain is our 

Fixed Deposit

Thoughts are our Current Account

Achievements are our Capital

Character & Morals, our Stock-in-Trade

Friends are our General Reserves

Values & Behavior are our Goodwill

Patience is our Interest Earned

Love is our Dividend

Children are our Bonus Issues

Education is Brands / Patents

Knowledge is our 

Investment

Experience is our Premium Account

Our Aim is, 2 Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately…
& the Goal is, 2 get the ‘Best Presented Accounts’ Award!

Friday, March 18, 2011

Ditto for India

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help ~ Ronald Reagan

Thursday, March 17, 2011

drunken fact..

1 Ltr =1000ML
1/2 Ltr= 500ML 1/4 Ltr= 250ML But
"Daru"
1Full=750ML
1Half=360ML
1Quater=180ML
Why?
Kyuki govt pinewalo ko chutya samajhti hai
"JAGO GRAHAK JAGO"

Sent from my Nokia phone

Nehra jokes..

Couple silent in bed.

Wife thinks :
Why is he not talking to me?
Is he thinking of another woman?
Does he like someone else?
Is he seeing someone?
Don't I appeal to him anymore?
Are wrinkles showing on my face?
Is he trying to dump me?
Is he now finding me ugly?
Have I put on weight at the wrong places?
Does my make up repel him these days.
Is he upset with my nagging?
WHY IS HE UPSET?

Husband thinks :Why the hell did Dhoni give the last over to Nehra? :O X_X

Sent from my Nokia phone

Chanakya said..

Chanakya said:
"Don't share ur top secrets with anyone; b'coz, if u cant keep ur secrets with u, dont expect somebody to keep ur secrets with them."

Then it will suck out all the gossip fun that we have.. Kya Chanakya, how boring! :P Sent from my Nokia phone

Sympathy..

3 log marne k bad swarag k darwaje par pahuche..
.
1st-me pujari hu mene aapki zindagi bhar sewa ki mujhe andar aane do.
.
God-next.
.
2nd-me doctor Hu. maine zindagi bhar logo ki sewa ki mujhe andar aane do..
.
God-next.
.
3rd-meh shaadi shuddha hoon....
.
God-Bas kar pagle rulayega kya, chal andar aaja.

Sent from my Nokia phone

Couple Jokes..

Couple silent in bed.

Wife thinks :
Why is he not talking to me?
Is he thinking of another woman?
Does he like someone else?
Is he seeing someone?
Don't I appeal to him anymore?
Are wrinkles showing on my face?
Is he trying to dump me?
Is he now finding me ugly?
Have I put on weight at the wrong places?
Does my make up repel him these days.
Is he upset with my nagging?
WHY IS HE UPSET?

Husband thinks :Why the hell did Dhoni give the last over to Nehra? Sent from my Nokia phone

Live Tension Free

Earth weighs 6.6 Septilion Tons,
Don't make it heavier by carrying tensions & heavy heart!
Stay light,Laugh a lot,Love much, & Enjoy each moments. Gud mrng n a tension free day ahead

Sent from my Nokia phone

Anatidaephobia.. Do you have it?

A KFC restaurant in Cairo is completely staffed and managed by deaf people.

This Kentucky Fried Chicken is entirely run by the hearing-impaired, from the cashiers, to the cooks, even the managers! Another pair of deaf branches have also been opened in Pakistan. The venture provides over 35 jobs at each branch, which is an invaluable asset for people with this sort of disability because otherwise they would have a harder time working in this predominantly hearing-person industry. 

It is easy to assume that the hearing/non-hearing language barrier would be difficult to overcome for your average customer, but the KFC makes things easier with a user-friendly pictorial chart which patrons can use to order. And let’s be honest, it’s not like ordering fast food from hearing people is always a walk in the park. 

Pehchaan Kaun

He started writing early in life and published his first book at age 17, Main aur Woh — a ‘conversation with himself’, inspired by Frederich Nietzsche’s Thus Spake Zarathustra,[

3]subsequently he has published two more books.

After his schooling, he did his B.Sc. and Post Graduation in Physics, thereafter he did his MBA from Institute of Management Technology, GhaziabadIndia. During his MBA education he decided to make his career in advertising.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Another fact

According to the Children in Nature website, "Children can identify up to 1,000 corporate logos, but fewer than 10 plants or animals native to their backyards."

3 Year Alcoholic Boy Admitted

A 3 year old boy has been admitted to hospital for alcoholism. The unnamed child is being treated in a West Midlands hospital when it was discovered that he had been given alcohol regularly for at least 6 months.

3 Year Alcoholic Boy Admitted to Hospital

The Heart of England NHS Trust identified a string of underage children with serious drinking problems in a study last year and this was the youngest and most troubling case. Doctor’s fear that the boy will suffer withdrawal problems such as mood swings and the shakes, but could – more seriously – have suffered brain damage.

Nicolay Sorensen from Alcohol Concern said:

“To be diagnosed alcoholic, it’s possible this child would have shown a physical dependency. ’They would have had to ingest enough to cause withdrawal symptoms. It is a horrifying case.”

No details of the child’s background have been given, but the case will serve to highlight concerns about the availability of cheap alcohol for home use through supermarkets – and comes on the day that drink charities have pulled out of the Government’s proposed ‘alcohol responsibility‘ deal.

We’re in two minds on the issue, being both fans of the drink and opponents of people being sick outside our house. But using extreme outlying cases like this as a basis of or justification for law is rarely helpful. It’s also worth nothing that, despite the horror stories and tabloid front pages, we’ve been drinking less booze in Britain for several years now, so perhaps some of the bluster and hand-wringing is a little misplaced.

No comfort to the 3 year old boy, of course. Godspeed little man – and hope the rest of your life works out better for you.

[img courtesy: Wikimedia]

July 2011 - 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays, 5 Sundays

Outline
Message claims that July 2011 has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays and that this combination of days only occurs once in 823 years.

Brief Analysis
It is perfectly true that July 2011 has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. However, such a combination occurs far more often than every 823 years. The last occurrence was in July 2005 while the next occurrence will take place in July 2016. The message is just a revamped version of very similar- and equally erroneous - messages about August and October 2010. 

Pehchaan Kaun?

He studied at St. Vincent's High SchoolPune in the state of Maharashtra in South West India; and then at Fergusson College, Pune. In 1960, he joined the National Defence Academy, Pune, and in 1964, he joined the Air Force Flying Colleges in Jodhpur and Allahabad. He served the Indian Air Force between 1964–1972 and was a recipient of eight medals in his career[3]. After a premature discharge from the Air Force, he ran a small fast food shop in Pune and was spotted by Sanjay Gandhi during one of his trips there and was one of the young people at that time that he convinced to join politics with the Congress Party. He has served effectively in various capacities with the Congress since and is now one of the wealthiest businessman as well in Pune even from his known sources of income.

Who is he?

Temporary

I got this SMS from a very good friend of mine. 

Isn't it surprising that we want every thing permanent for a temporary life! Strange but true.

I just want a permanent job with permanent growth. Want to make some permanent property and live in permanent peace! :) 

And the poor snake dies..

LONDON: A snake attacked an Israeli model during a sexy photoshoot by biting into her surgically enhanced breast and later died from silicone poisoning. 

Orit Fox, a B-list model and actress initially looked comfortable during the shoot in Tel Aviv, wrapping the massive boa constrictor around her legs, waist and neck while doing her best to look sexy, reports the Daily Mail. 

In a figure hugging red and white striped dress, which revealed maximum cleavage, she gamely tried to take their bonding to the next level by licking the snake's face. As she manoeuvered the animal into position for the 'kiss' Fox loosened her grip on its neck, and after being licked the reptile reacted angrily. 

It aimed straight for Fox's prized assets and sunk its teeth deep into her left breast. An assistantrushed in to help her pull the snake off and after a few seconds of struggle the creature released its grip. The peroxide-blonde model was rushed to a nearby hospital and given a tetanus shot. However, the snake wasn't so lucky and died from silicone poisoning.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Dard Ke Phool Bhi Khilte Hai

Dard ke phool bhi khilte hai bikhar jaate hai,
ZaKhm kaise bhi ho kuch roz mein bhar jaate hai,

Us dariche mein bhi ab koi nahi aur hum bhi,
Sar jhukaye huye chup chaap guzar jaate hai,

Raasta roke khaDi hai yahi ulajhan kab se,
Koi poochhe to kahe kya ki kidhar jaate hai,

Naram awaaz bhali baatein mohazzab lahaje,
Pahli baarish mein hi ye rang utar jaate hai

Sachin Tendulkar

Liverpool FC, an English professional football club, bid goodbye to its 17 years of association with a famous beer brand Carlsberg (Probably the best beer brand in the world) last year. Back in India, one of the greatest batsmen in the history of Indian Cricket declined an offer to endorse a top liquor brand. Sports world is truly moving towards a healthier lifestyle; or rather they have taken responsibility to guide the youths globally. How I wish I was right. Both of these deals may have same consequences, but they don’t have common intention. Liverpool dumped Carlsberg for a better offer from Standard Chartered and the Indian batting maestro dumped the offer for his values, social responsibilities and a promise made to his late father, Mr. Ramesh Tendulkar.

The legendary Sachin Tendulkar has proved his skills on the cricket field, but his gesture is worth appreciating. Soon after the news, Maharashtra Government appreciated the master-blaster’s decision of choosing principles over money. Maharashtra Government very cleverly appreciated him but has not adhered to his principles. Sachin has sacrificed Rs. 20 crore offered to him, but Maharashtra Government is not willing to sacrifice the lucrative tax revenues. They allow licensing of liquor and then initiate de-addiction policy as a social service.

I know that I have influence on youngsters and I don’t feel that I want them to think if I should endorse these products I want them to use them,” said the famous footballer Pele who was also known as the Black Pearl. The little master has followed the same path and has kept his word. His father had told him that people will offer lot of money for ads but he should never endorse brands that are not good for youngsters. He had promised his father that he will never endorse alcohol and Tobacco brands ever in his life. A true example of an icon indeed.

For the country like India, where most of the young people follow one ‘Ma’ i.e. Cinema; and Cricket is considered a religion, both these medium affect and inspire the citizens. Sachin Tendulkar’s action is surely an example set for the legendary actors like Mr. Amitabh Bachchan who flaunted his cigar for ‘Family’ or recently to Mrs. Aishwarya Rai Bachchan who was seen doing the same on the posters of ‘Guzarish’.

On the other hand, Cigarette and Liquor industry are very important tax revenue hubs. Consumption of Beer has jumped 51% from 70 million cases in 2002 to 105 million cases in 2006. The consumption of Indian made Foreign Liquor (IMFL) grew 53% to 115 million cases. Between April to August end this year, the Delhi Government raked Rs. 776.56 crore excise tax on liquor. It provides employment to many. It is like raising a question ‘is the very existence of Tobacco and Liquor Industry ethical?’ Every citizen of India has got a right to consume what has been offered legally. After all India is a free country.

MS Dhoni, who was MTV youth icon in 2006, has happily signed the deal of Rs.26 crore for three years with UB group. Sachin, as usual, has gone beyond this.  With this step, he has become an icon for the youth icons, both off and on field.

I also feel that one cannot force anyone to do anything. After the rejection from Sachin, the offer will go to some other celebrity who will happily endorse it. Neither will it make any difference to the liquor firm, nor will it make a deep enough impact for drunkards to stop drinking. What if Sachin had endorsed the ad and donated Rs. 20 crore towards the making of a hospital or initiating some social welfare programs? The money intoxicated in the liquor world would have entered a better world for progress of mankind.

Let’s raise a toast for the inspirational decision!

‘Cheers’ to Sachin!

Japan - Be Careful, if it rains..

Be Careful, If it rains 

  
There was a nuclear blast 4:30pm Sunday in Fukushima Japan. If it rains today or in the next few days, DO NOT GO UNDER THE RAIN. If you get caught out, use an umbrella or raincoat, even if it's only a drizzle. Radioactive particles, which may cause burns, alopecia or even cancer, may be in the rain. 
  
BBC flash news : 
Japan government confirms radiation leak at Fukushima nuclear plants. Asian countries should take necessary precautions. If it rains, remain indoors first 24hours, close doors n windows, swab neck skin with beta-dine where thyroid area is, radiation hits thyroid first. Take extra precautions, radiation may hit Philippines starting 4pm (Pinas time) today! 
  
PLEASE PASS THIS MESSAGE. 

Hello Guys!!

Hello Guys,

Just getting used to few of the tools here. 

Enjoy!!

apoorvv

I am Mallu

1.I am not a Mallu I am a Malayali 2.Shakeela is not from my state 3.Sreesanth is from my state,but I hate him. 4.My mother tongue is not Tamil. 5.I may like Rajnikanth or Shah Rukh Khan.....but I always prefer Mohanlal 6.I love cricket...but I love footb
...all more 7.I am an Indian....yes Sachin is God..... 8.All my uncles are not in Dubai... 9.I am not always a Nair 10.I am an alcoholic,unless I am gay impotent or just plainly scared of mom. 11.I may or may not be Marxist,but essentially a socialist 12.I may not laugh at your joke...no offenses..blame it on Jagathy Sreekumar..I have already heard them. 13.You may not laugh at my joke...no offenses...blame it on Sreenivasan...you would not understand. 14.I am a non vegetarian.....and Yes I eat beef 15.If you find me and another malayali shouting at each other animatedly at the top of our voices calling each other names...never bother we are just having a healthy discussion on Mammootty and Mohanlal. 16.When I was a student....I never bunked...we just called a strike... 17.Yes I use a lungi....and play football wearing it.....now you can't beat that. 18.I don't understand Kadhakali....... 19.I don't like you much,I may look down upon you...can't help it....that is how we are made.... 20.When you are talking to me....never mention Poland....again blame it on Sreenivasan..you wouldn't understand :P
By: Es Saji

Open Letter To Sachin

Dear Sachin,     

I feel sad. Even after 22 years of playing for the country, you are still expected to win matches on your own. We forget that apart from you there are 10 more players in the team. You have been the run machine in World Cups with an average ...of 60.  Even today while you yet again proved your class with a 111 the others around took it easy. You chased the ball in the outfield and ensured that your throws landed on top of the bails. Others preferred to drop catches or go back to the dressing room for a 'rest' while a substitute fielder came in.    Sachin, the current Indian cricket team doesn't deserve you. They don't know what it is like to give one's blood and sweat for this nation of a billion people. For them fame and money has come to easy and undeserving - not commensurate to the 'supposed talent' that they posses. Do you remember what you had said to Tom Alter in that interview in 1989? "I just want to play cricket".     Sachin, let me also not hide the truth - you are not my favorite cricketer - but one plays favorites only with humans - not with Gods for they are revered, emulated and looked at in awe...   [We expect Sachin to win this cup for us. But what about the other players? Are they supposed to be playing ludo in the dressing room? I hope that the rest of the team wake up and realize that they are not there to 'play' in the tournament, they are supposed to 'win' it - not for themselves, not for India but for the greatest Indian to have lived - Sachin Tendulkar.     P.S: In the 1992, Hero Cup semi-final in Eden Gardens Kolkata (India Vs. SA), SA needed 6 runs to win off the last over. Tendulkar snatched the ball from Azhar and bowled a magnificent over to win that match for us. (He gave away only 3 runs). Maybe our team needs to watch that over to know what guts and glory are all about.]     Sachin, I hope we win the final in Wankhede. If we don't a billion people can only hang their heads in shame and ask for your forgiveness.   Regards, One of your undying fans who: 1. Still goes crazy when you hit that straight drive and show us the manufacturer's name on the bat. 2. Stayed awake late into the night before my end terms to watch that 100 in Sharjah in the midst of that sandstorm. 3. Relished every shot that you played to decimate Warne in 1998 and then Shoaib Akhtar in that 2003 World Cup against Pakistan. 4. Will stop watching cricket after you retire.      
By: Telugu

Aakhiri

Jaagey hai der takk humein, Kuch der sone do.. 
Thodisi raat aur hai, subah toh hone do..

Aadhey adhoorey khwaab jo, poore na ho sake.. 
Ek baar firse nind mein woh khwaab bone do..

Jaagey hai der takk humein, fursat se marne do.. 
Thodisi saans baaki hai, sukoonn se lene do..

Jalle hue khwaab the mere, raakh bhi na bann paaye.. 
ek baar firse maut ka, khuraak hone do..

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Mumbai

Mumbai is the land of opportunities.. Careers.. Dreams.. Success.. Failure.. Poverty..

Sometimes I become speechless when I talk of mumbai.. Mumbai is mumbai..

You have no words to express it.. Mumbaikars have no words to express it.. May be because they really can't express it, or may be they just can't keep their words..

That's when you realize that mumbai is actually fake.. hollow..

Anyway, words and mumbai don't go hand in hand.. Forget about professional commitments, don't believe in their promises too..

Because that is mumbai.. Speechless.. Mute..

Sent from my Nokia phone